Once you begin uni you're going to acquire a very particular set of skills, skills that will make you the Liam Neeson on surviving the life that comes with moving away to university.
Sit tight and absorb the wise knowledge that has been passed down from generation to generation.
Well, let me start off by saying you've already made a big mistake with even going to university so 10 points off for you Gryffindor. (You may as well just buy crypto.)
Hustle and hustle some more my G’s because from this point on shit's about to get a whole lot harder, let's begin!
Being skint comes with the uni job description so here are some tips to keep you from counting your pennies at the queue. Budget like you've never budgeted before. This online website will help you with those money mishaps.
You can also acquire a budgeting card like this one from Loot. Save some spare cash on a monthly basis, for those rainy day money problems, like food! Rent, bills and of course nights out. There is also an app that comes with this saving card so if you stay on a budget it's a weekend of fiestas for you young stallions.
Now if budgeting isn't your forte then that leads me onto my next tip, hustle, in the words of 50 cent "I'm a hustla, I'm a, I'm a hustla, homey." But before we start spitting lyrical bars here are some ideas on how to hustle.
Sell freebies - you can find free stuff online and selling won't be difficult in this generation of vintage hipsters, just add a back story to your item and wallah you my friend have yourself a deal.
Tutoring - Got some kids you can exploit, good, tutoring can be an easy way of reeling in the cash, just make sure you teach them enough to make you look good the rest is up to books.
Take part in drug trials - You already take drugs so what's the harm in taking some more especially when it's for a contribution to science and medicine, I mean come on you're like basically helping to cure chronic baldness, you sir are a hero.
I know it's hard not having your mums homemade roast dinner, but hey have to learn to cook and you can still make the student equivalent, examples being pasta, the Italian go to dish for any occasion and you can pull off a stunning meal to impress the in-laws with too!
Just whack out the pesto and hey presto, a fancy meal for four (if you got parmesan) and if there are leftovers you can make a great lunch.
Recipes and fresh market ingredients can also ease the stress on the wallet!
Remember haggling is key to getting the best deals just get into the method acting mode and bring out the inner cheapskate in you.
Now I know the washing machine might seem alien to you, like a transformer from another planet but honestly, it's just as easy as using a kettle. relax and follow these simple steps if you cant be bothered to google the instructions.
First washing powder is essential so that should be a top priority. (She says in a non-patronising way) But honestly, some people really do forget so I'm just putting it out there.
Pull out essentials and make sure there's a rota for when you and other housemates use the washing machine.This could be helpful for keeping chaos ascending in the house, we don't want world war 3 with your new flatmates in year one.
If you didn't know colours should not be washed with whites. Colour catchers can be helpful for those lazy types.
Then choose a temperature that sounds cool (30 or 40 sound about right ) and press start.
There you go, you're officially a washing connoisseur.
Chores are a must when living with others, you don't wanna be the one that leaves their unspeakable's all over the flat, so yes cleaning your own mess is considered a good start when co-existing.
Cleaning is boring at times but jazz it up, turn up the vol on the radio and get the whole house involved!
Cleaning rotas are handy when everyone knows what they need to do. Trust me they’ll get stuck in.
It will be like a recreation of Annie minus the evil house mum.
LIVING WITH FLATMATES
Unfortunately, you're not going to get on with everyone in the flat. If you do however come across the evil flatmate, talk to them mano to mano and lay down the law, maybe do a couple of abdominal crunches before hand just to show them who they're up against.
Sit them down…. And calmly discuss your most intimate secrets, that always breaks the ice and you never know, you might have just found a lifelong friend.
But jokes aside, talking and getting things out in the open can really help clear the air so try it, it might just work, well maybe not the abdominal crunches if you're not the fittest but hey there's always contouring.
Follow the above, make uni a breeze and get out into the big wide world.