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Mixologist concocts most expensive cocktail ever
Friday 12th October 2012 | Liam
In what seems like a very strange way to spite the recession, a legendary mixologist has concocted the most expensive cocktail in the world.
By using 200-year-old ingredients, cocktail expert Salvatore Calabrese created a drink so expensive only the five richest kings of Europe can afford to taste it.
Coming in at a cool £5,500, no previous concoction has cost quite so much to put together as Salvatore’s Legacy. The drink includes a splash of 1778 cognac, a sprinkling of 1770 liqueur, a drop of 1860 Curacao, a dash of 1900 bitters, a collection of ancient Egyptian pottery, crushed pearls, pirate treasure, shards of Saxon gold, and scrapings from the Mona Lisa.
"He's really sticking it to those bankers who duffed up the economy," said one admirer. "It takes a lot of guts to concoct a cocktail that costs almost half the amount someone on minumum wage earns in a year." The admirer continued: "Sure, I'm usually outraged when a pub charges more than £3.60 a pint but this is different. This cocktail could save lives."
A cocktail spokesperson echoed these sentiments, saying: "Whether subconsciously or not we will shortly begin to see the benefits of this ludicrously expensive cocktail filter through to the poor unemployed people who are having their benefits 'reformed'. You never know, you might see recipes for this cocktail cropping up in local food banks. What's that now? Don't give me that face..."
It wasn’t a simple matter of mixing old expensive liquor together either. Mr Calabrese had to postpone his world record attempt for three months when one of the original bottles smashed.
The cocktail, made inside a gentlemen’s club, isn’t expected to be the biggest selling drink in terms of volume. Due to its relatively extortionate price Salvatore’s Legacy is unlikely to reach out to the inhabitants of local Wetherspoons's, as the pub chain inevitably moves to procure its own version of the cocktail at a snip of the price.
Regulars sat in the murky depths of a Wetherspoons in Waltham Cross at midday, sipping on their Carlsbergs and Woo Woos, were not overly impressed by the price. “How much?!!!” said one horrified customer, spitting their cocktail back into the pitcher through a straw and handing it back to the barmaid before storming out. A group of old men flicking through the Daily Mail in the corner acknowledged the price of the cocktail but then turned back to their papers and grumbled incoherently about immigrants and the irresponsible youth of today.
The true test for Calabrese’s cocktail came when the Guinness World Records people came. “Yeah, it’s old,” said one adjudicator, “and it’s also expensive. So it probably deserves the accolade. But it’s not really delicious like a Margarita or Frisky Bison. It also doesn’t have any Guinness in it. And I really prefer drinks with a touch of Guinness.”
Salvatore Calabrese’s feat is expected to inspire a host of anti-recession copycat attempts, with the world’s most expensive muffin already being prepped, and the most expensive energy saving light bulb and bubble gum also being touted.
By Liam McKenna
